REMEMBERING AFTER EIGHT YEARS!

February 19, 2015

In spite of our grief we can still see God’s faithfulness and goodness.

Although we are still grief stricken, life moves on.  We are thankful for new seasons, new life and new relationships.

I can still see it all (vividly) unfolding in front of me. I feel that helpless feeling. I can hear that moaning… that deep guttural moaning. The screaming and tears are still so real to me.

However, I am now able to see past the profound heartbreak, past the eternal events of that fateful night.  I am able to better (not completely) understand part of His Divine plan for our family.

Here now, eight years later, we still grieve his untimely death. But we celebrate the life he once lived. We celebrate life with those left behind because that is what Buddy would want and expect. He died so that others could live. So live we must. Enjoy life we will. And remember that our American Hero will always be with us in some way or another.

Remembering the husband, the father, the son, the friend.

Saluting the Soldier:

SGT BUDDY JAMES DOC HUGHIE
KIA, FEBRUARY 19, 2007
NURISTAN PROVINCE
AFGHANISTAN, ASIA
TWO BRONZE STAR MEDALS (V)
PURPLE HEART

Always smiling

Buddy and Cooper

Like father, like son


Some of my life’s experiences have been pretty miraculous.

April 6, 2012

Much has been debated over the centuries as to the existance of God.  Many who do not believe in God challenge, “Where’s your proof?”  Generally speaking that question is usually followed-up with name calling (both to the one who believes and the One, Whom we believe in).

I don’t have the answers for them.  I do know that I have (personally) had some very unique experiences that anchor my beliefe in the Most High God.  At one time in my life when I caused myself to “hit bottom” I reached out… again to the Comforter.  I did so because I “heard” Him say, “Come to me now or I will not pursue you any longer.”  You see up unto that point in my life I had used God as my Almighty Bail Bondsman.  No not to get out of jail but like, “Oh Lord, if You will just get me out of this mess…” kind of thing.  I know that the Bible says that God will never leave us nor forsake us and at this particular time I felt like God was saying to me, “I won’t pursue you.  It’s all going to be up to you to get yourself through life.  Do you really think you can do it all on your own?”  When I say I “heard” I don’t mean an audible voice but rather a split second conversation of sorts.

So anyway, I was in this dire situation when He came to me in a most dramatic way.  I have no scientific proof and I don’t need scientific proof.   In that moment even the air felt different.  What I do know is that when He and I finished our conversation I was transformed from an angry, frightened and unsure about my future man to a man of immeasurable peace and completely comfortable about what the future held for me.  I can not begin to explain the overwhelming sense of… I don’t know, peace and contentment just doesn’t seem adequate to describe it.  I was changed.  My situation and circumstances had not changed but I had.

That was the moment for me.  The defining moment that anchored my faith.   Of course I have had many challenges since then.  Difficult and painful challenges.  And I have not always answered those challenges the way I should have.  But, I have been able to recognise where I’ve made poor choices and turn from them back to Him.  Before The Encounter I may or may not have recognized my failure and if I had would likely have felt a sense of “Ha, got away with that one.”

Another spiritual marker in my life was when my father died.  That was such a dark, depressing time and also a  time of great questioning. I wrote about my deliverance from that here:

https://mssc54.wordpress.com/2008/08/26/my-angel-story/

I have personally witnessed a man’s leg grow two inches.  I have personally seen a little girl with a three inch platform shoe on one foot throw that shoe away when her leg miraculously measured to the length of the other.  I have (time and time again) received financial blessings that could not be explained or planned for.  I have sustained traumatic injuries and healed from them far beyond all the doctors expectations.  My life has been transformed and by my life’s transformation my family has not only been made whole but flourished.

I know there will be those who can take each of these instances in my life and explain them away with some sort of scientific explanation or possibly psychological disorder.  How sad for them.

All I know is that God is real in my life.


Dr. Terry Jones

September 8, 2010

I will not presume to know if you have heard the Word of the Lord as it relates to burning the Qur’an. 

I pray that you are crystal clear on the Message that you have received from Him.  If you are 100% clear that this action is of the Lord,you (of course) must proceed.  However, if this is in fact from the great deceiver then I pray that you receive revelation knowledge to that fact.

Holy Scripture tells me that His ways are Higher than mine and that I can not understand the mind of the Lord.  I surely do not understand how burning a Qur’an is showing those whom do not believe in Christ the Savior that He IS the only way to the Father.  Neither can I understand how stirring up more hatred is His way.  But it is not my “job” to understand what you are doing.  It is, however, my responsibility to pray for those in places of leadership.  I believe that for a season that is you Dr Terry Jones.  Pray I shall.  I shall pray that you have the strength, discernment and wisdom to follow the leading(s) of the Great I Am.  I shall pray that anything short of completely following Him that He will “interupt” you from any and all disobediance by the means He deems appropriate.  I pray that you have longevity of life.

1 Corenthians 8:7-13 speaks of us causing our brothers to stumble.  Additionally in Ezekiel 34 the Lord Speaks of the shephards’ responsibility as it relates to them (the shephards) causing the sheep to “not be fed.”

My family has suffered the deep sorrow that can only be felt through the killing (by a Taliban sniper) of one of our loved ones.  We miss our American Hero terribly.

Please take a moment to read what I wrote of those early days.  A series titled “DEATH AT THE FRONT DOOR” (parts 1-3).  It has been a very difficult journey to love those whom I can not understand. But in the end I have come to bettere understand that He IS in control and He does not NEED (nor require) me to help Him with His plan.

I am to love and pray and when necessary “shake the dirt from my sandals.”

Blessings to you as you remain obediant to His Calling.

https://mssc54.wordpress.com/our-american-hero/


MEMORIAL DAY 2010 – WE STILL REMEMBER!

May 31, 2010

Sgt. Buddy James Hughie

HUSBAND, FATHER, SON, FRIEND

KILLED IN ACTION FEBRUARY 19, 2007

TWO BRONZE STAR (medals) WITH VALOR, PURPLE HEART

Entered into eternal rest serving in Operation Enduring Freedom

Afghanistan, Asia

 

Killed in Action (KIA) with a single shot from a Taliban sniper while rendering aid to Afghan Army Nationals.  Sgt Hughie went where no other dared.  He saved the lives of two men who were of a different race, a different religion, who lived in a foreign land and they spoke a different language. In the process, his heroic actions cost him his life.  Sgt Hughie stepped out and went where others refused go.

We love him and miss him dearly.  If you have not visited  the links “Our American Hero” and “Sgt Buddy James Hughie” on this home page please take time to do so and get to know our American Hero.  He is the one we knew as Buddy, the one with the radiant white smile who was always willing to help you with whatever needed to be done.  The world is a little darker without Buddy Hughie.

Enjoy your freedoms for they are bought with the blood from our American Heros.


Why go international when you can stay local?

October 14, 2009

I’ve been wondering lately…  In many cases adoptive parents will spend tens of thousands of dollars to adopt a child from a foreign country.  Now don’t get me wrong I believe that every single child deserves a home where they can be loved and cared for.  What I don’t get is why people will go to such effort to (basically) purchase their child from a foreign government.

If you are a regular reader of this blog then you know that our family is in the final throes of completing the adoption of “our” five year old son and seven year old daughter.  They are biological brother and sister.  I won’t go into the sordid story as too how this all happened.  If you don’t know and want to know you can look back through previous posts.

Here’s one thing I learned while attending our Parenting Class at the local Department of Social Services.  Most people want to adopt an infant child who is perfect in every way (not even the hint of  a single defect).  No physical, psychological or emotional problems.  Well guess what, not even birth parents are guaranteed that!  So why is it that some perspective adoptive parents have this fantasy of a “perfect” infant child?  I know, I know, it’s only human nature to want only the best for your child and family.  Our family are no different in that regard.  With the pregnancy of each of our birth children we dreamt and prayed for a healthy baby.  We have been blessed that the Creator’s plan for us was to honor our prayers.

Perhaps in a later Blog post I will address why it is that the vast majority of people view the perfect infant child as one who has no physical defects and by all scientific terms falls into the proper percentile of the various fields of measurement.

But to get back on topic;  We know first hand how difficult it can be to adopt a child from The State.  God knows it can be exasperating, pre=””>aggrevating, annoying and will just plain ol tick you off at times.  However, it is important to keep the end goal in mind.  We are not doing this for our benefit!  I think that is where the biggest difference lyes.  Some perspective adoptive parents plan to adopt a child for what the child can do for them.  I think that attitude or expectation perverts the relationship from the git-go.  Instead of wanting to provide a nurturing, loving environment for a child in need they want a child for what the child can fulfill for them!!  That is a pretty heavy load to place on a child who, for all intense and purposes, has already had too much trauma in their little life.

One of the exercises we (as a group) had to do during our Parenting Class was;  each couple or individual was given a card.  On this card was the name of a child or siblings, which included their first name and a brief (true) history of the environment they came from.  Also listed were any “issues” the child/children had demonstrated (playing with matches, acting out sexually, aggressive behavior, et .).  Then we went around the table and stated why or why not we would adopt this particular child.   How would we handle the various “issues” each child had.  I was saddened and shocked to find that about 90 percent of the people said they would not adopt a child who had “issues”.  Now keep in mind that each of these people had previously said they wanted to adopt because they love children and want to give them a loving and nurturing home.   LIARS!  I mean, excuse me!?  You mean you want a perfect little child who can fulfill some void you have and one who can fulfill your fantasy of your perfect family with the white picket fence and all.  You disgust me.

So those can be some of the horrors of Adopting Local.  Now for International Adoptions.  We have not done this but have close friends who have.  They adopted three children from Russia.  All three children were under the age of eight at the time of adoption.  They ended up with a “buy two and get the third free” package.  They spent over forty thousand dollars (cash money).  Then of course they had to bring with them anything the child would need.  They get the child (basically) naked.   This particular International Adoption story began as a wonderful story book tale.  However, two of the three children eventually ended up in trouble with the law while the third still struggles to keep it all together.

I have had some people tell me that God placed on their heart to adopt internationally.  Really?  Didn’t God know that there are hundreds or perhaps thousands of needy children right in your own local community?  I wonder why God didn’t place you in that foreign country near those children.  Is it at least possible that YOU saw the need for foreign orphans THEN PRAYED FOR GOD TO BLESS WHAT YOU WANT?!  Of course, I can not see into any person’s heart.

Here are the statistics from the INTERCOUNTRY ADOPTION – Office of Children’s Issues, United States Department of State.

2000 – 18,477

2001 – 19,224

2002 – 21,378

2003 – 21,516

2004 – 22,884

2005 – 22,739

2006 – 20,679

2007 – 19,613

2008 – 17,488

Total 191,988 INTERNATIONALLY ADOPTED CHILDREN

I also found that “cash out of pocket” International Adoption can range from $11,325.00 – $20,679.00.  So using my mad math skills if I average those two sums and then multiply that by the number of adoptions for the years 2000 through 2008 I come up with THREE BILLION, SEVENTY-TWO MILLION, THREE HUNDRED FIFTY-ONE THOUSAND, NINE HUNDRED NINETY-SIX DOLLARS ($3,072,351,996)Wow that’s one heck-of-a-lot of money spent to help only 191,998 children.

Can you imagine (with me) what the International Community would look like if more than three billion dollars had been spent on improving the lives of ALL the children in those countries?  How life altering would that be if orphaned children in foreign countries were the benefactors of US dollars?  Instead of seeing US as people who are taking a child here and there, US could be seen as building entire communities where orphaned children could (possibly) receive the best care imaginable.  What would the future of ALL of those children look like?

Now continue to dream with me.  What would our own local communities look like of  those parents who adopted Internationally had adopted the unwanted, unloved, abused and neglected children out of their very own “back yards?”   I dare say the world would look at US in a very different light.  I further dare to say that the Creator of those little lives would look on (not only US) but each of us in a very different light.

Once again, I can not see into the human heart to determine it’s intent.  Whether the intent is to fulfill a personal (aka prideful) dream or to sacrifice their life for that of one who can not defend or provide for themself.  Adoption should be a selfless, sacrificial life style.  If you are not willing to sacrifice YOUR LIFE at least send a check to an orphanage in your local area.

There’s got to be more I can do for these children.


These have been (some) of my experiences.

September 24, 2009

Much has been debated over the centuries as to the existance of God.  Many who do not believe in God challenge, “Where’s your proof?”  Generally speaking that question is usually followed-up with name calling (both to the one who believes and the One, Whom we believe in).

I don’t have the answers for them.  I do know that I have (personally) had some very unique experiences that anchor my beliefe in the Most High God.  At one time in my life when I caused myself to “hit bottom” I reached out… again to the Comforter.  I did so because I “heard” Him say, “Come to me now or I will not pursue you any longer.”  You see up unto that point in my life I had used God as my Almighty Bail Bondsman.  No not to get out of jail but like, “Oh Lord, if You will just get me out of this mess…” kind of thing.  I know that the Bible says that God will never leave us nor forsake us and at this particular time I felt like God was saying to me, “I won’t pursue you.  It’s all going to be up to you to get yourself through life.  Do you really think you can do it all on your own?”  When I say I “heard” I don’t mean an audible voice but rather a split second conversation of sorts.

So anyway, I was in this dire situation when He came to me in a most dramatic way.  I have no scientific proof and I don’t need scientific proof.   In that moment even the air felt different.  What I do know is that when He and I finished our conversation I was transformed from an angry, frightened and unsure about my future man to a man of immeasurable peace and completely comfortable about what the future held for me.  I can not begin to explain the overwhelming sense of… I don’t know, peace and contentment just doesn’t seem adequate to describe it.  I was changed.  My situation and circumstances had not changed but I had.

That was the moment for me.  The defining moment that anchored my faith.   Of course I have had many challenges since then.  Difficult and painful challenges.  And I have not always answered those challenges the way I should have.  But, I have been able to recognise where I’ve made poor choices and turn from them back to Him.  Before The Encounter I may or may not have recognized my failure and if I had would likely have felt a sense of “Ha, got away with that one.”

Another spiritual marker in my life was when my father died.  That was such a dark, depressing time and also a  time of great questioning. I wrote about my deliverance from that here:

https://mssc54.wordpress.com/2008/08/26/my-angel-story/

I have personally witnessed a man’s leg grow two inches.  I have personally seen a little girl with a three inch platform shoe on one foot throw that shoe away when her leg miraculously measured to the length of the other.  I have (time and time again) received financial blessings that could not be explained or planned for.  I have sustained traumatic injuries and healed from them far beyond all the doctors expectations.  My life has been transformed and by my life’s transformation my family has not only been made whole but flourished.

I know there will be those who can take each of these instances in my life and explain them away with some sort of scientific explanation or possibly psychological disorder.  How sad for them. 

All I know is that God is real in my life.


A conversation with my five year old son.

June 4, 2009

Alexis Callegan Hughie

This is a picture of my grandson “sitting in his daddy’s lap” on Memorial day 2009

I picked up our son from school today.  As we were driving through the neighborhood he started with his “question series.”

Son:  Dad do some people die in their house?

Dad:  Yes son, people die every where.

Son:  Then they dig up the ground and…

Dad:  No son, you can’t bury people in your yard you have to bury them in the cemetery or the grave yard.

Son:  What’s a grave yard?

Dad:  A grave yard  is where people get  when they die.

Son:  Is Buddy at the grave yard?

Dad:  Yes son, Buddy is at the grave yard.

Son:  Can we go to the grave yard and check out where Buddy is buried?

Dad:  Sure son, we’ll go right now.  (fortunately the grave yard  is less than two miles from our house.

Pulling into the grave yard:

Son:  Is this where Buddy is buried?

Dad:  Yes son, he’s right over there with the little American flag on his grave.

Walking up to the grave and looking at the grave marker:

Son:  Can you read that to me daddy?

Dad:  Sure, Sgt Buddy James Hughie…..

Son:  Is he in the ground?

Dad:  No, when they bury you they put you into a casket.

Son: What’s a casket?

Dad:  A casket is kinda like a box they put you in to bury you.

Son:  What do they look like?

Dad:  There are lots of different kinds.  Would you like to go see some?

Son:  Yes.

Fortunately the funeral home who handled the arrangements for Buddy’s funeral is less than a five minute drive and I know the funeral director personally.

Entering the funeral home we sit on one of the couches.  A family soon walks by and the elderly lady remarks that she likes Son’s hair cut.  He says thanks, then stands up and sticks out his right hand and introduces himself with a nice to meet you.  Well that blew her away and they “chatted” a bit.

Mike comes over and I explain why we are there.  His eyes get big and asks, “Really?”  So he shows us into the room where all the caskets.

Dad:  You see this one son?  This is one like Buddy was buried in.  They put his head on this pillow and his legs go down here.  Then they put him in a big room so everybody can come to say good by.  After that they closed this part and took him to the grave yard and buried him.

Son:  How did they dig the hole?

Dad:  They have a big machine called a Backhoe that digs it.

Son:  How did they get Buddy to the grave yard?

Dad:  They put his casket in the back of a car called a hearse and everybody followed him to the grave yard to bury him and say good by.

Son:  Why I didn’t get to say good by daddy?

Dad:  Well son you were only three years old and you probably don’t remember but you and sissy looked at his picture at home and said good by at home.

Son:  Can we go home and look at his picture now daddy?

Dad:  Sure son.

Conversation on the way home.

Son:  How Buddy died daddy?

Dad:  Remember Buddy was in Afghanistan and a bad man shot and killed him while he was helping other soldiers who were hurt.

Son:  Why the bad man did that daddy?

Dad:  Because bad men do bad things son.

Son:  Where he shoot him?

Dad:  Right here (pointing at my arm pit).

Son:  That killed Buddy?

Dad:  Yes son the bullet went into his heart and broke his heart so it couldn’t pump blood anymore.

Son:  Was his clothes bloody when he was shot?

Dad:  I’m not sure son.

Son:  Did he have a big hole in his body?

Dad:  I’m not sure son.

Son:  Did they put a band aid on him?

Dad:  I don’t think so son.  I don’t really know what they did.

We are home now and Porter wants to watch Kungfu Panda.  I wish I could hear how his little mind works.

God sure has shown this boy so much grace and mercy… as well as his daddy.