MEMORIAL DAY 2011 – WE STILL REMEMBER!

Sgt. Buddy James Hughie

HUSBAND, FATHER, SON, FRIEND

KILLED IN ACTION FEBRUARY 19, 2007

TWO BRONZE STAR (medals) WITH VALOR, PURPLE HEART

Entered into eternal rest serving in Operation Enduring Freedom

Afghanistan, Asia

Killed in Action (KIA) with a single shot from a Taliban sniper while rendering aid to Afghan Army Nationals.  Sgt Hughie went where no other dared.  He saved the lives of two men who were of a different race, a different religion, who lived in a foreign land and they spoke a different language. In the process, his heroic actions cost him his life.  Sgt Hughie stepped out and went where others refused go.

We love him and miss him dearly.  If you have not visited  the links “Our American Hero” and “Sgt Buddy James Hughie” on this home page please take time to do so and get to know our American Hero.  He is the one we knew as Buddy, the one with the radiant white smile who was always willing to help you with whatever needed to be done.  The world is a little darker without Buddy Hughie.

Today as you storm the beaches remember those whom stormed beaches long ago.

Enjoy your freedoms for they are bought with the blood from our American Heros.

THE SEASON OF LENT

Much has been written about the Lenten season  I don’t suppose my little ramblings will change much.

In my personal opinion the Church Doctrine of Lent has become a means of allowing many people who say they are Christians to pretty much do as the please throughout the remainder of the year.  However when Lent rolls around these same “sayers” will give up some food group or stop using some technology that consumes a portion of their day or heck, some may even practice acts of benevolence!  But what are these same people replacing those voids in their life with?  During any other time of the year if someone gives up a specific food group what is it called?  It’s a diet.  Right?  If someone takes a break from  technology what is that called?  Maybe a vacation?  If someone practices sporadic acts of benevolence what is that about?  Making the giver feel good about what they are doing?

On the other hand, when people determine that the Holy Spirit (not the calender) is calling them to change destructive patterns of behavior in their life and they obey His leading then there can be true, daily and lasting transformation(s).  The old has passed away…

I think if you approach the season of Lent with the view of “look how bad or slack I’ve been” the enemy has already won.  Guilt does not come from the Lord.  On the other hand, if you approach the season of Lent with the view of  “what daily changes can I make in my life to reflect the teachings of the Savior and too become more Christ-like” then you may be heading in the right direction.

So, are you being lead by the days on a calender or some Church Doctrine?  Or are you seeking The One Who created time?  The former leads to spiritual death.  The later leads to Life eternal.

The choice has always been ours to make.  Choose wisely.

 

SOMETHING IS BASS-ACKWARDS!

 

                                                            

In the United States of America you can be fined $5K and jailed for tampering with an American Bald Eagle egg.

In the United States of America a female may (under the Obama Health Care Plan) be entitled to receive Federal (tax payer) money to remove the baby growing inside of her.

In other words, it is NOT your right to pluck out a bird but it is your right to pluck out a baby!

MEMORIAL DAY 2010 – WE STILL REMEMBER!

Sgt. Buddy James Hughie

HUSBAND, FATHER, SON, FRIEND

KILLED IN ACTION FEBRUARY 19, 2007

TWO BRONZE STAR (medals) WITH VALOR, PURPLE HEART

Entered into eternal rest serving in Operation Enduring Freedom

Afghanistan, Asia

 

Killed in Action (KIA) with a single shot from a Taliban sniper while rendering aid to Afghan Army Nationals.  Sgt Hughie went where no other dared.  He saved the lives of two men who were of a different race, a different religion, who lived in a foreign land and they spoke a different language. In the process, his heroic actions cost him his life.  Sgt Hughie stepped out and went where others refused go.

We love him and miss him dearly.  If you have not visited  the links “Our American Hero” and “Sgt Buddy James Hughie” on this home page please take time to do so and get to know our American Hero.  He is the one we knew as Buddy, the one with the radiant white smile who was always willing to help you with whatever needed to be done.  The world is a little darker without Buddy Hughie.

Enjoy your freedoms for they are bought with the blood from our American Heros.

An Attitude of Gratitude

The last few months I have allowed myself to become so busy that I got caught up in what can be the every day drudgery of life.  Bad me.

However, just over the last few days or week or so I have been more reflective in nature.   As I have (intentionally) gone over some of my life long issues of hurt and woundedness I have realized that in spite of my bad habits and poor choices I have found myself in a place of blessing.

For many years I lead a life of self-indulgence.  I used to have the tendency of compartmentalizing my life.  For instance if I was not deliberately abusing my children then I was a good father.  After all I was better than those fathers.  If I could feed my (former) drug use without actually having to spend money then, of course, using drugs was not a problem.  If I could still hold down a job then there certainly was nothing wrong with drinking two quarts of Jack Daniels a week!  I was good at compartmentalizing.  Or perhaps the more professionally accepted term would be “rationalizing.” 

I ended up in Alcoholics Anonymous for a while.  However, I never did like their “One Day at a Time” philosophy.  To me that was saying that, ” I betcha one day I’m going to fall off the wagon.”   I did do at least two meetings a day for the first ninety days.  Some days I would do three meetings!  I got all the cute little chips and listened to all the stories about why others drank.  It was their spouse’s fault.  The kids drove them nuts.  Their boss didn’t like them.  They were abused as a child.  The wind was blowing.  The lighting was bad.  Their mother didn’t breast feed them but did breast feed their siblings.  And on, and on, and on.   But in fairness to all the story tellers I haven’t been to an AA meeting in a couple of decades or so, so maybe the tone has changed.  But I doubt it.

It’s a wonder I didn’t end up needing treatment for depression!  At first I latched on to the “I have a disease” thing.  After all if I wasn’t responsible then I would have no responsibility for my past actions.  Heck, I just couldn’t help myself.  I mean have you ever heard of anyone blasting a cancer patient for losing their hair?!  I have a disease!  I just can’t help myself!

Man this post is starting to go all  over the place here.

Anyway, I lost a significant portion of my life because of drug abuse, alcohol abuse and mostly too SELF PITTY!!  I’m actually still trying to work through and figure out how it is that I (specifically) came to feel that I always got the short end of the stick!  I can go down the list.

1.  My dad travled out of town 4 or 5 nights a week.  So I basically had an absentee dad.

2.  I was the only boy with 4 sisters.  I did get a brother when I was 13 but for all intense and purposes, poor me was raised in a girl’s dormatory.

3.  Teachers and other adults would (almost) always tell me what beautiful eyelashes I have!  Why the heck would you tell a little boy he has beautiful eyelashes!  That can scar a kid!!

4.  My dad used to just beat the living tar out of me!  I mean BEAT ME!!

5.  My grandfather was an alcoholic.

6.  My father was an alcoholic.

7.  My grandfather was a womanizer.

8.  My father was a womanizer.  Heck he even took me with him one Saturday to visit his girlfriend.  Well he didn’t tell me that’s what we were doing but when we pulled up in his green Plymouth I had to wait out in the car while he went to “visit.”  I can still see her standing on the backdoor stoop holding the screen door open for my dad.  She had blonde hair put up in a bun and had on a pretty tight-fitting yellow dress.

9.   Where the hell did that blonde haired woman in the tight-fitting yellow dress think my mom was?

10.  Don’t hit your sisters.  You don’t know your own strength.  It doesn’t matter that they hit you first.  You’re a boy and they’re a girl.

11.  You have to go to mass on Sunday and on Holy Days of Observation.  Now go get me a beer out of the refrigerator and get the lighter fluid for my lighter.

12.  We don’t have the money for that.  Do you want to ride with me to get some beer.

13.  We don’t have the money for that either.  You can go to the golf course with me if you are quiet.

I doubt my childhood was much different from most of my classmates.  But I sure did like more attention than the other kids.  Any attention really, good  or bad, just please notice me.

ENOUGH!!  My wife and I just celebrated out thirty-sixth wedding anniversary!  Our thirty year old daughter is married to a great guy and they have a five-year old son and a fourteen week old daughter.  Our twenty-six year old daughter (although widowed three years ago) has a great guy who looks at three-year old Cooper as his son and Coop to him as his daddy.  Our twenty-one year old daughter has been in a relationship with a young man she went to highschool with and there is talk of marriage (come day).  Ummm Brindon don’t forget to talk to the father first.    After much discussion between my wife and I and our three older children we then prayed about what God has in store for us in this season of life.  So in November of 2009 we adopted.  So in addition to the aforementioned daughters we also have an eight year old daughter and a five-year old son!

I am in very good physical health.  I am in good mental health.  I believe my spiritual life is on track.  I have a wife that not only loves me but is also committed to me.  I have five wonderful, happy and healthy children.  I have two very active grandsons and a beautiful little granddaughter.  My peach trees are doing well.  My plum-tree is loaded.  Our vegetable garden is going gangbusters.  We have a fantastic church family.

LIFE IS GOOD AND I AM ETERNALLY GRATEFUL FOR ALL OF THESE BLESSINGS!

Keep The Children – Send The Parents Back

I can not begin to tell you the range of emotions I have felt since this sad and tragic story broke.

First of all, we have close personal friends who adopted three children from Russia.  The children were two brothers and a sister ranging in ages from six to eleven.  This was more than a decade ago.  None of the children spoke english and the adoptive family did not speak Russian.  To say it was difficult from the beginning would be accurate but would not really give you any sense of what life was like for the adoptive children or the adoptive family.  I must say that I truly admire the adoptive family.  The children posed more than cultural challenges.  But I think that most people fail to step back and try to look at things through the eyes of adoptive children.  Really think about that for just a minute.  They have hopes and dreams too.  They want to be love and accepted.  They want to be safe and to feel secure.  They want some sense of belonging.  They want to not have to worry about their day-to-day life… where will they live?  Who will they live with?  What will they wear?  What will they eat?  Just imagine not having any control over a single aspect of  your life.   Is it any wonder that many adoptive children are less than what adoptive parents dream of adopting?!

Can I just get real.  When I heard about the mother sending that young Russian boy back to Russia… alone on that long plane flight and then a two-hour ride with a stranger to his final destination it made me so angry that if there were absolutely no consequences what-so-ever (legal or spiritual) I would find that woman and beat the living crap out of her!!  Seriously.  But fortunately for her I am bound by legal restraints and (most importantly) spiritual edict.  And yes I know that since I even had the thought… Forgive me Father.  Thank You.

I think there are a whole lot of adoptive parents who are just selfish, foolhardy individuals.  They have this fantasy dream of what their life would be like if they could just adopt a perfect little “Johnny” or perfect little “Suzy.”  Guess what folks, you are messed up in the head!  What sort of chance do you think your adoptive child stands since your head is messed up beginning this process?!  Properly caring for (adoptive or birth) children takes sacrifice!  When you determine that you are going to raise a child what you really should be saying is, “I hear by give up my rights as an individual.  I will make all future decisions based on what is BEST for my child.  I will be selfless.  I will provide for my child in every way needed.  If my child needs extra help in a certain or specific area that I am unable to understand or provide, I will seek out those who can provide that help.  I will learn what I need to learn to help my child through whatever he/she needs help with.  I will nurture my child and teach he/she discipline.  I will demonstrate to my child how to succeed by helping him/her succeed.  I will be the rock that my child can always count on.  I will not be perfect but I will faithful to him/her.  When I screw up I will tell him/her that I screwed up and I will try to do better.  I WILL BE THE PARENT!!”

Now I would love to say that I have been perfect and true to all of that but that would be a lie.  I have learned most of what I know by not doing it right the first or fourteenth time.  But I know it now.

And if you haven’t read any of my previous Bolg posts our family has also adopted two children.  We know first hand the difficulties.  But we also know first hand, the rewards of staying true to our beliefs and working through the less than perfect scenarios.

Be a blessing to your children.  They need and deserve nothing less!

THE DAY OUR LIVES WERE FOREVER ALTERED!

 

Sgt. Buddy James Hughie was shot and killed by a Taliban sniper while (serving as an army medic) rendering aid to wounded Afghani Army National soldiers.  Buddy went to the aid of men who had darker skin, were of a different religion, had different customs and spoke a different language.  He was credited with saving the lives of two of those foreign soldiers.  Perhaps those men are with their children today. 

Buddy was posthumously awarded the Purple Heart and two Bronze Stars with Valor for his selfless acts of heroism that day on a foreign battle field.  He was to rotate home in less than three months to rejoin us, his bride of two years and baby Cooper… age thirteen weeks and three days.

We will always remember the two weeks Daddy Buddy was home for the birth of baby Cooper.  He was up night and day with his little boy, feeding him, changing his diaper and cradling him in his arms as he looked lovingly into his eyes.  I can clearly remember Buddy holding Cooper while looking at his newborn pink skin and saying in an awe-struck, loving voice (almost a whisper) “You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

Greater love hath no man than to lay down his life for him.

This video still makes me cry when I watch it:  http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=6648845

Sgt Buddy James Hughie (right)

Sgt Hughie personally volunteered to go on every mission into the local villages to inoculate local children like these.

Sgt Hughie’s Memorial Service in Afghanistan

NOW FOR A PERSONAL MESSAGE:

Thirteen weeks and three days after this picture was taken….

I remember meeting Buddy for the first time.  He looked me in the eye, shook my hand and had that big smile he was famous for.  At that time we had three daughters that were of dating age so I had done the drill of “meet this guy” a few times.  I knew there was something different about Buddy because I did not dislike him right off.  There was just something about him that was appealing.

Eventually Buddy became more than my daughter’s boyfriend.  He became my employee, he became my friend.  For nearly a year we rode side by side in my work van everyday.  We talked about everything.  I was very fortunate in that I was able to closely observe him in a daily basis.  I was able to watch how he interacted with people, how he treated them and how he did not treat them. 

One day when we sat down for lunch and the waitress brought our food Buddy looks across the table to me and says, “Before we eat I need to ask you something.”  What’s up, I replied.  “I would like your permission to marry Alexis.”  I smiled and told him that of course he could have my permission and that I was happy to move our relationship to the next level.  Buddy was just an old-fashioned guy and I liked that.

Whenever we would see Buddy and Alexis together they always looked so happy and full of life.   Their love for each other was obvious.  He treated her like a queen, always doing all the little things that a young man does when he adores his woman. 

A little over a year after they married Buddy deployed to Afghanistan, Asia.  While he was deployed Alexis moved back in with us.  By now she was pregnant so we converted our diningroom into a bedroom for her and the baby.  Buddy scheduled his leave to coincide with the birth of their baby.  He so wanted to be there for every moment he could with their baby.  You see, Buddy never met his father.  He was determined to be the daddy that he never had.  He was home on leave two days before Alexis went into labor and infant Cooper was born.  I wish you all could have seen the radiance on both of their faces.  The way they looked at each other and infant Cooper is etched into my mind’s eye.  I can still see Buddy feeding Cooper, burping him, changing his diaper, talking to  him and snuggling with him in the bed.

After feeding and changing Cooper’s diaper it’s time for some sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Buddy holding Cooper and Carter. 

 

Buddy holding Cooper with Porter.

The man who many others would eventually come to know as a bona-fide American Hero was the man we knew as:

HUSBAND, DADDY and FRIEND.

Our lives are richer because Buddy James Hughie became a member of our family.  He loved us and we love him.  I only wish I could have better appreciated  just how close we all are back then. 

 

Prophetic word.

My local church is a nondenominational church.  One of the criticisms that non denominational churches get is that the Senior Pastor is not accountable to anyone.  I understand, of course, that we are ALL ultimately accountable to the Lord but some people need to know that their church leader is not just out there doing willy-nilly whatever he personally chooses.  Some pastors have taken advantage of their position of authority and “wounded” many souls.  I am very pleased to say that I completely believe that my pastor is obedient to the voice of the Lord and that he also submits to his pastor’s guidance.

Some years ago my pastor wisely recognised his need/desire to find himself (and ultimately his “flock”) a pastor’s pastor.  He is involved with a group of other pastors who meet (via conference call) on a weekly basis.  Periodically our pastor’s pastor (Pastor Rod) comes to visit.  Pastor Rod (ironically) is from the same Cajun home town that my mother is from so when he comes to visit and speak/teach I can easily understand his sense of humor and relate to his stories. 

Last month when Pastor Rod was visiting our church he prophesied over some people.  Not everyone but most (I think).  The following is the word he had for me and my Mrs.

**I WAS VERY CAREFUL TO TRANSCRIBE THIS VERBATIM.  I MAY NOT HAVE PUNCTUATED PROPERLY BUT THESE ARE THE EXACT WORDS.**

 

SATURDAY, JANUARY 24, 2009 – Pastor Rod

 

Michael the boudin man.  God we thank you for Michael.  This is your wife?  Your wife?  Bonnie is your wife? Your married?  35 years that’s a long time.  That’s good.  She’s good to you, yeh.  Yeh, I married Mary, I married her when she was 11.  Yeh you married…yeh, no doubt about it, beautiful women marry ugly men.  Holy Spirit we anoint them, in Jesus name, in Jesus name. There’s fresh oil coming (from heaven).  There’s fresh oil coming Michael.  I’m just…I just hear this word.  God says I’m going to take the wildness you had in your old life and I’m going to anoint you to be a wild man in the House of the Lord, to to be anointed to take authority over the powers of darkness and set the captives free.  In Jesus name.  In Jesus name.  And, and God I just hear the Word of the Lord as Michael gets close to the authority of the House, come under good, come under good support him.  There’s a spirit of prayer on your life and God wants to increase it in days to come to come under your pastor to under gird him with prayer in Jesus name.  Let’s hear this word for both of you.  Deacons in the House.  Servants in the House.  In Jesus name serve the tables, go to the pastor and pastor whatever… pastor you’re getting ready to build a new building.  God is going to anoint your hands to work out there and to help and to be a labor in the field in Jesus name. 

 

God bless this woman.  God increase her in days to come, in Jesus name.  You are not a reject. You are not a nobody. You are a somebody in God’s Kingdom, in Jesus name.  You love folks not the Lord says come forth and start lovin them. Just start reaching out to them, in Jesus name the enemy has tried to keep a bushel over your life.  I just see a spirit of rejection.  Intimidation has tried to  come against your mind… hey, I can’t do anything.  God says you can, I’ve anointed you to do, I’ve anointed you to be in Jesus name.  I see the gifts of helps inside of you, to be a helper in the House of the Lord and to use these hands to serve the table, in Jesus name.  I see you spreading out food at tables.  I see you serving people.  I see you loving people with the love of your hands and your heart in Jesus name.

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I think when these sort of moments happen in our lives it is important to make the time to get the recorded message and to transcribe it.  That way you can read over it time and again.  I think this enables one (or at least me) to more easily see the path and to recognise that when certain moments appear it was not by happen-stance.  It is important (to me) to recognize the Divine Order over/in my life!

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UPDATE

February 4th, 2010

This morning has begun as a most challenging morning.  I was looking back through some of my earlier posts and “stumbled across” this one.  I sure needed to hear this again.  I think I’ll print it out, laminate it and keep it in my Bible to regularly review it.

Since this prophetic word was spoken over me we have adopted a five-year old boy and a seven-year old daughter (they are biological siblings).  It was forty-two month process but God was faithful in every way to see us through all the necessary legal hoops.

GONE HUNTING!!

 

I’m leaving this morning to go to a friend of mine’s place to go hunting (today and tomorrow).  Charleston County South Carolina has the longest deer hunting season in the US.  It opens on August 15th and runs through January 1st.  And we don’t play around with primitive weapon season, shotgun season and rifle season.  Well, they do on Government land but on privately owned land its wide open the entire time.  You can shoot as many deer during the season as you want but are limited to two antler deer per day and there are doe days sprinkled throughout the season.  However, you  can also buy up to four doe tags ($5.00 each) from the Department of Natural Resources.

In SC we can also “bait” deer.  Which means we can put corn out for the deer to eat near where our stand is.  Now don’t imagine that we put corn down and the deer line up in herds to eat either.  They aren’t that stupid.

I say I’m going hunting but I believe it’s going to be a time of ministry too.  You see my friend’s wife lost her battle with liver cancer about a month ago.  So now he lives out in the country in their two-story house all by himself.  I guess his closest neighbor is just over a mile from him on the same road.  I can’t tell you how far away one of his friends lives… I’ve been over to his place a couple of times and I guess Buck is about 5 or 6 miles away.

My friend was going to stay with his (93 year old)  mother-in-law over Christmas.  He arrived at 5pm and ended up leaving at 2am.  I called him and he sounded so lost and depressed.  He said that there were so many pictures of his deceased wife around the house that he just couldn’t take it.  He just wrote his mother-in-law a note and left in the dark of night to come home.  That was from SC to VA and back in less than 18 hours!

So, I’m going to go up, cut some firewood, visit with my widower friend and sit in a deer stand for the next couple of days.  I sure do hope and pray that the Lord blesses my friend while I’m there.

I’m worried about him. 

 

Is it that time of year or a life style?

 

The other day I stopped by the local Dollar Store for something or other.  I forget what it was.  But then I found Nilla Wafers for only $3 dollars a box so I picked up a couple of boxes.

I got in line behind this eldery lady who had a couple of cans of beans, toilet paper, a six pack of soda, a single Christmas card and a few other things.

When it was the elderly lady’s turn I leaned over and put my Nilla Wafers on the counter with her stuff and instructed the cashier, “Ring all of this together please.  I’ve got it.”  You would have thought I offered to buy the elderly lady a new car or something.  The cashier looked up at me with a smile and winked.  The elderly lady… well she was ever so grateful.

That simple act seemed to make such a difference in her day.  I think she was even walking taller.  I offered to help her to her car but she said she could manage.

Have you ever noticed how many elderly people shop at the dollar store?

Stop in at your local Dollar Store, pick yourself up some cookies and make a difference in someone’s day.  But you don’t have to wait until the Christmas season.